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Parenting is Hard

Did you read the online article about a mother selling her 4 tickets to the One Direction Concert on eBay? It seems that it may have been a hoax but...

Did you read the online article about a mother selling her 4 tickets to the One Direction Concert on eBay? It seems that it may have been a hoax but the gist of the matter was this “fake” mother was selling tickets that she had purchased to take her daughter and friends to the concert. In the online post, the mother (using some very inappropriate language) said that she was selling her tickets to punish her daughter for her inappropriate behavior. 

I applaud parents who do set boundaries and limits which also means having consequences when children break the rules. In many circumstances taking away something often teaches children a lesson.  I disagree with posting it all over the internet. This is a discussion that can and should happen in the home, between parent and child (of any age), rather than sharing the issue and humiliating their child. 

I often relate a similar story with my own children when talking about consequences with parents. When my boys were about 7, 5 and 2 we had tickets to breakfast with Santa and a parade after that. The older boys had been before and really looked forward to this annual event.  They were at the age that they constantly bickered and fought (often) and it just wore me out. 

The day before the event I told them that if they did not stop fighting they would not go to breakfast with Santa.  Well, it must not have been an hour later that the older two were fighting and I said, “that’s it, you are not going to see Santa or the parade!”  I picked up the phone and called a friend who had two children and asked if she wanted to join us the following day to see Santa.  The following day the 2 year old and I left the house and the 7 and 5 year old starred out the window crying as I backed out of the driveway.  I will never forget those sad faces. I was equally sad as I too loved taking the kids to this annual, but they had just pushed and pushed. They still say they remember that punishment and my friend still has the picture of her kids on Santa’s lap! 

The moral of this is really two fold. A parent’s job is to be a parent and at times it is hard, really hard. But teaching children about consequences for their choices and behavior is one of the most important jobs a parent has. With that being said, humiliating your child is never appropriate, even when you are pushed to the limits.  Being a parent means you can’t resort to acting like your child.

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